Relationship Healing Articles
The 7 Mindsets Blueprint For A Great (and Terrible) Relationship
Self-Compassion Is Your Perfect Present Guidance
Understanding And Dissolving Your Toxic Ties
How To Relate With Someone Who Does Not Want To Grow
Overcome The Fear Of Being Irrelevant
Curing Heartache, Unworthiness And Anxiety
How To Remain In Love
The Price For True And Lasting Love
The Method For Relationship Success
The Method For Receiving The Relationship You Want
The Method For Ending Toxic Communication
The Method For Freedom From Dependency
The Method For Finding True Love
YOUR INNER PEACE IS YOUR GREATEST POWER

Curing Heartache, Unworthiness And Anxiety:

Exploding The Myth About Unrequited Love

You are intrinsically loved and infinitely valued by the Divine Source of your being, by the absolute Power of the universe, by the Pure and Perfect Nature of Reality.  But you certainly don’t feel that way when your heart is aching deeply, let alone breaking into bits.

  

When you feel unloved and devalued, it is not because of the nature of reality.  It is due to your level of consciousness.  You are in a “space” where you confuse mental abstractions about reality, and habitual emotional reaction patterns, with what is actually going on.

  

Exploding The Myth Of Unrequited Love  

When you feel the pain of unrequited love, it is not another’s presence or love that you long for.  It is the presence of love for yourself that you long for, the certainty that you are intrinsically, infinitely valued, cherished, precious, sacred, even holy in the heart of the Divine.

  

The ultimate human fear is the fear of being intrinsically unloved and unloveable, of being too flawed or inadequate to be deserving of love.  Every experience of anxiety, to whatever degree, can be traced back to this root-terror.  When we feel this terror we feel psychologically crushed by it to the point that going on living feels too painful and utterly pointless.   

  

False Paths Of Escape  

See what we do to escape this fear.  We desperately pursue the interest of a lover who symbolizes to us our worthiness for love.  To conquer the interest of this lover is to free us from the childhood wound consisting of our first crushing blow to our sense of worthiness for love.  

  

The problem here is that even if we do succeed in the conquest of love, it proves fleeting.  We attract what we are, meaning that the one we draw to us carries the very same wound we seek to escape through him or or. 

  

Because no one outside of us can protect us from our inner wound, we must eventually disappoint that person who approval gets us high on the energy of falling in love.  This triggers the arousal of his or her wound.  The pain of this is so excruciating that he or she then perceives us as the enemy, the cause of the torturous sense of his or her unworthiness.  This person then lashes out at us, passive-aggressively or aggressively, in an attempt to get free of the pain.  Our wound is then re-aggravated and once again we feel crushed by the attack or the abandonment.  We then may make the mistake of believing that we need to get back into that other’s graces to free ourselves from the wound of love’s abandonment.  We then either go on suffering because we have so lost that other’s trust that he or she will continue rejecting us; or, if we happen to regain that other’s trust, we merely find ourselves repeating the cycle of pain in a short time, when we once again trigger off one another’s wound.

  

The Solution  

The solution to the terror of being unloved and unlovable, and to anxiety in general, is to free ourselves from the internal state of emotional reaction that causes us to feel unloved and unlovable.  (Using THE METHOD accomplishes this liberation).

  

The reality is that you are unconditionally and infinitely loved and valued by the Divine Source of your existence.  Your chief task is to free your consciousness from the internal blockages to your direct experience of this dimension of reality.  

  

Merely telling yourself that God loves you, trying to believe it, and telling others to believe it is like using a band aide on your epidermis to cure internal bleeding. 

  

You need to direct your consciousness into the actual experience of being infinitely loved and intrinsically valued and remain there.  This takes inner work, the work of directing your attention into the internal experience you need.

  

As you advance in this process you experience the kind of joy you feel when you fall “madly” in love with someone whom you believe is “madly” in love with you.  Multiply this joy by ten-thousand and you approach the actual experience of it.  It is really entering into a love affair with God.  

  

As you live in the joy of this Divine Romance your physical world reflects your inner harmony and the manifestation of your hearts deepest desires take place, and then some.  If the pain of unrequited love leads you to this ultimate experience of true love’s liberation in your heart, the unbounded joy proves more than worth it.

  

  

  

It's hard, if not impossible, to make our breakthrough into our Divine Love Affair on our own.  To receive my phone-coaching to make your breakthrough, contact me and we will find a time to chat on the phone. 

If you would like an inspiring, heart-healing talk or workshop on achieving the joyful breakthrough on the other side of a broken heart, contact me to set up a time to discuss your needs.

  

www.thebestloveadvice.com  Phone: 770-364-9580   Email: bob@boblancer.com

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